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"I'm trying to be a good teammate here so I'll try to imagine what it's like to be imperfect."
"I'm trying to be a good teammate here so I'm going to buy my liquored-up, idiot kicker an entire case of vodka."
"I'm trying to be a good teammate here so I'll consider retaining Tony Dungy as my associate head coach next season."
"I'm trying to be a good teammate here so I'm taking the whole team on tour with Kenny Chesney."
"I'm trying to be a good teammate here so I won't ask my daddy to get my offensive line traded."
"I'm trying to be a good teammate here so next year I might even run a play or two that my offensive coordinator calls."
"I'm trying to be a good teammate here so I'm going to let Tee Martin start for me in the playoffs from now on."
"I'm trying to be a good teammate here but instead I'll just be myself."
Headlines That Are Probably in Newspapers This Morning ?
Washington: "Redskins left to wonder if Week 2 watercooler dousing of Joe Gibbs was perhaps a bit premature"
Seattle: "Here's a [expletive deleted] surprise: Rain in forecast for NFC title game"
New England: "Quite frankly, Tom Brady is apparently not all the Patriots need"
Denver: "Shanahan still without two playoff game victories since Elway retired"
Charlotte: "Delhomme shot with high-powered tranquilizer dart to calm him down for flight home"
Chicago: "Lack of playoff neck beard dooms Grossman"
Pittsburgh: "Broncos ask to play AFC Championship game in Pittsburgh"
Indianapolis: "Vanderjagt, Colts outchoke refs, Bettis in historic choke-off"
Canada: "Ontario native Vanderjagt boots potential game-tying kick aboot 10 yards wide" (Subhead: "Eh")
United States: "Nation waits to learn fate of five offensive linemen thrown under Colts' team bus"